Jokes about lawyers speak for themselves. In Russia they only appear, but in England they exist throughout long time. And many of them are known around the world. We will tell to you some classical jokes about lawyers.
Q: How many lawyer jokes are there? A: Just two... all the rest are true. Q: What's the difference ( разница ) between a lawyer and a trampoline ( батут )? A: You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline. Q: Where can you find a good lawyer? A: In the cemetery ( кладбище ).
Q: When attorneys die, why do they bury ( хоронят ) them 600 feet underground? A: Because deep down ( в глубине души ), they're really nice guys. Q: What's the definition of mixed emotions ( смешанные чувства )? A: Watching your attorney drive over a cliff ( со скалы ) in your new Ferrari. Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a terrorist? A: You can negotiate ( вести переговоры ) with a terrorist.
Q: What's the difference between God and an attorney? A: God doesn't think he's an attorney Q. What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire? A. A vampire only sucks blood at night.
Q: Where do vampires learn to suck blood? A: Law school.
Q: What do honest lawyers and UFOs ( НЛО ) have in common ( общего )? A: You always hear about them, but you never see them.